In Memory

in memory

Matthew John Crain
20th July 1989 – 11th December 2005

Matthew – born at 5.56am in the middle of a scorching summer on 20th July 1989.  My first born, a smiler from the first, his eyes shone when he was happy which seemed to be most of the time.  He filled my life with love, laughter, tears and arguments.  Always a big lad, a good mate to his 2 younger brothers Dale and Jordan, a lovable rogue and a fantastic artist.

He had his first fit at 9 years old after falling off an icy garage roof playing ‘tiggy’.  His second after falling 2 stories out of a tree landing on top of one of his maters the branch which broke swinging back up blacking another friends eye.  But this was Matt not one to do things by half, had to go the whole hog.

His fits at the beginning only happened after bangs on the head but gradually started to occur without.

Everyone knew about his Epilepsy he wasn’t one to keep anything to himself.  He was totally open and honest, if he’d done something he told me, I recall a few embarrassing conversations, one where he discussed his growing body hair which he insisted on showing me much to my horror and other about his friends and what he planned to do or had done with them, all I seemed to say at the time was “There are certain things you tell your Mum and some you don’t and that falls into the don’t”.

He was known by so many people we couldn’t go anyway without him saying ‘Alright’ to someone passing.  He never lacked for company always out and about whether it was going to see him beloved Sheffield United or out with his friends.

He fell in love with one of his best friend’s sisters both sharing a love of Disney DVD’s.  The Little Mermaid, Aladdin or Bambi being his particular favourites often quoting lines from them or singing songs, he was in love when died for this I will be always thankful.

His family was the most important thing in his life nothing would keep him from family get togethers.

He was loud, lovable, fund and one to put friends straight if he though they weren’t treating their mum right, much to my amazement and disgust, he would put them right and still have a blazing row with me. “Cheek” I’d think.

Every night before bed, he’d kiss me goodnight and say ‘I love you’.

He lived his life to the full his Epilepsy didn’t stop him.  He crammed so much living into his 16 years.  I look back now and think did he sense his life would be short because his motto seemed to be ‘Do everything now and deal with the consequences when I have time.’

To me he was my baby no matter how big he got.  To Dale and Jordan the best big brother anyone could want.  To everyone else he left some sort of impression usually a smile when thing of his antics though they were probably pulling their hair out at the time.  He was one of the good ones sticking up for the underdog usually loudly not caring if he ended with in detention when at school which was quite often.

Matthew thought with his heart not his head which could get him into trouble but to me this was his strength and who he was a walking talking heart, I think we should all be like this more often.  Only one through the years did he ever ask “Why me, why do I have this?” what could I say but that was our Matt.

I received a book of memories from his teachers at Newfield School after he died these are some of them.

‘Matt sitting in his English Class with the rest of the ‘lads’ trying to out do each other with their stories. Matt telling his and boasting while still doing his cross stitch.’

‘Matthew doing his artwork and designing things a please to watch him, when he was asked to draw a portrait of the soon to retire headmaster from a photo.  The look on his face when the portrait was presented he was so proud.  The portrait was brilliant.’

‘Matt’s wonderful smile, that way he had of looking at you sideways and grinning.  He’d put his arm on our shoulders cross his legs and kind of lean on us grinning.  A warm, funny, caring and talented person.’

My lasting memory will be at Bramall Lane, he came to see me at half time to say hello.  I hadn’t seen him over the summer.  He squeezed past the chap next to me on the kop and stood about 2 inches from me, it was the closest conversation I ever had with him.  The twinkle in his eye and that wicked smile.  The sight of the deputy head teacher Mr Poore enough to make him jump into action.  If he ever suddenly took his cap off without being asked we knew Mr Poore had been spotted.  Matt’s respect deepened for him because he was a ‘Blade’ too.

Mathew had love and pride in his art.  When he passed his GSCE Art, I was so pleased for him, he was my success!

Spending many happy hours with Matt in Y7 and Y8.  He was so cheeky, funny and always made me laugh.